Has your sexlife started to fade off? Do not worry – there are solutions. If you and your partner have been together for a number of years, you have probably noticed that the relationship may not be as it once was. You do not have sex as often as you wish, the flirt between you has faded and the spark that was there in the beginning is far more timid than in the beginning. Everything you need to know about how to get your sexlife back on track.
When you are in love and the relationship is new the body produces sex hormones testosterone, estrogen, dopamine and oxytocin. It’s this good cocktail of hormones that gives you the experience of intense happiness and well-being when you’re in love with someone. Unfortunately, this don`t last forever, and after about two years the hormones will stabilize and return to their normal pattern.
Also read: 7 Top sex drive killers
Your sex life on top when newly in love
Scientists do not know exactly why this is happening, but it can certainly be linked to our development. It is true that newborn children are more likely to survive if they have parents who stay together the first years of their life. It is very common for the relationship to turn into friendship after a few years.
When we are newly in love, the attraction and sex drive between women and men is more similar, than how is going to be later in the relationship. Everyone remember how intoxicating delightful it is at the beginning of a relationship. You can not get enough of each other, talk together for hours, caresses, kisses sends sweet text and flirting.
It’s just these activities that turn the woman into a slightly more volatile dying pattern than the man. She must feel a real mood to want sex. When love falls into friendship, some of these activities disappear and it is more difficult for women to be “ready” for love and sex at all times.
The man often does not understand what happened to the lady who always wanted food and sex. Men often have a slightly more predictable and direct ignition pattern. It makes his approaches seem a little abrupt when she is not in the right mood.
Also read: Women can get better sex life over the years
Different sexual needs
If you and your partner have lost the sparkle and have different sexual needs, you can meet challenges. One party may experience performance anxiety by feeling that he or she never satisfies enough, where the other party has a strong desire at all times. The absence of enough sex pleasure can be so many, but some of the main reasons may be bad sex, when the man and the woman get horny in different ways.
The woman usually takes longer to be ready and must have the right tension build-up relative to a man. A lower testosterone level and external influencing factors such as unfaithfulness, abuse or a generally bad relationship can have an effect on the sex drive.
Also read: Lifelong joy of sex
Show care and closeness
Our sex drive can be reduced whether we are in a good or a bad relationship. Whatever kind of relationship you are in, the desire is a new life by means of caring and closeness.
For the man, it is important to show that he wants the partner well, take care of her and do things for her he usually does not do in everyday life, such as making a romantic dinner. Communication is also very important. By talking together you will be able to get back to the sex scene. Talk about what may be the reason why the desire was gone and why you have sexual problems. Sex can quickly become a profit project, so it’s important to put it back on the agenda again.
Although you may not want to have sex several times a week, you can nicely show each other close and thoughtfulness in other ways. Couples who do not have sex can give each other kisses, lie naked next to eachother or simply just sit and hold hands on the couch.
This way you show that you appreciate your partner, and the spark that once disappeared can then return. Although it does not have to be a goal in itself to have sex, closeness and intimacy will recreate the tension between you.
Also read: Reduced sexual desire in women
Check your partner up
It’s important to take care of your sex life, but it must not be treated as if it were a dying patient. It’s better to have sex and be busy with each other than to” work “with your sex life or relationship. Having sex because you should is never a good idea.
The relationship is usually quite everyday and characterized by” teamwork “more than romance. In addition, we are more used to each other, and then maybe it’s not as exciting anymore. On the other hand, the relationship gets deeper, and it’s at least as good.
If you want to give your sexlife a little extra spark, a good advice may be to show more interest to your partner. Show interest in your girlfriend. Try to be a little positive and make life together, rather than a duty and a project. Many couples who have been together for a long time stop completely taking care of each other except when they have sex. You can not be cold and not pay attention all day, to expect glowing passion in the evening.